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Message de taranghiano77 posté le 21-01-2013 à 18:30:03 (S | E | F)
Bonsoir,
Je viens de rédiger un E-mail commercial/technique et j'aimerais avoir s'il vous plaît, vos remarques concernant la grammaire et les formes employées.
D'avance je vous remercie.
Dear Mr xxx,
By the present I would like to confirm our position on some topics we discussed on the occasion of the last meeting held the 10th of January
1.disinfection step for the vessel cleaning
We studied data we received and we can say :
There no significant added value of using a disinfections step with peraceitc acid in addition of the current acid disinfection.
The use of peracetic acid seems to improve micro result in the cellar of the fith floor ( aging cellar).
In fact if we compare result on six months period ( 1-6/7-12) we saw a difference of only 3% for CCT’s and 24 % for the storage tank cellar.
For CCT’S we suggest increasing circulation time from 20 to 40 minutes and skip the peracetic acid step.
Regarding the cellar of the 5th floor my colleagu will follow some cleaning and check further in detail how to explain these results.
In the last technical report related of dicember meeting (see attachment) we suggest some actions for improving micro situation in this cellar namely :
- Installing a rotating spray ball in maturation tank 5th floor => carry out a trial on one tank
- Implementation of caustic step cleaning.
- These vessel are flat and so not suitable for containing beer with yeast. Currently beer with yeast is filled and yeast decanted in the bottom creating a dense layer of yeast. Fix spray ball is not able to supply mechanical effect to remove this layer of yeast. These tanks should contain only filtered beer.
Are-you planning some of these actions ?
2.Disinfectant in the cold rinse bath water
We launched measurement and we should have first conclusion next week regarding the micro build up in the cold rinse bath.
My colleague will inform you and your staff about first conclusion as soon as possible.
We remind you that the water bath is currently renewed at each bath and concentration of peracetic acid is around 50 ppm even if our standard are 30 ppm.
3.Sequestrant in the warm rinse bath
Currently a sequestrant is dosed in the warm bath 2 of each bottle washer. This product prevent the scale build up and The main objective is to maintain nozzles free of scale and so to insure a correct rinse of bottle. Regarding wall surface, the objective is to maintain a low scale built up and then we consider as normal situation ,within a reasonable level of course, the presence of scale at the area impact of the outpouring water between bath.
At the moment plant aims for a zero scale tolerance and in addition to the preventive scale treatment carried out with the dosage of our sequestratn, plant performs on weekly base an acid descaling with a solution at 5 % v/v .
We foresees one soft descaling per year if needed and then the acid consumption is not included in the contract.
Few possibilities are available should you want to keep a zero tolerance against scale :
Review the global target consumption taking into consideration the consumption of 120 kg acid/machine/descaling. In that case this agreement should be endorsed by the purchasing department and our respected corporate manager;
Stop using our sequestrant and keep carrying out a weekly descaling;
Keep using our sequestratn and stop carrying out a weekly descaling unless for the yearly treatment.
We would like also to point out that a weekly acid descaling may cause corrosion phenomenon when it is apply on a long period. Furthermore this treatment is manually carried out and so that represents a risk in term of safety.
Sincerely,
-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 21-01-2013 19:01
Message de taranghiano77 posté le 21-01-2013 à 18:30:03 (S | E | F)
Bonsoir,
Je viens de rédiger un E-mail commercial/technique et j'aimerais avoir s'il vous plaît, vos remarques concernant la grammaire et les formes employées.
D'avance je vous remercie.
Dear Mr xxx,
By the present I would like to confirm our position on some topics we discussed on the occasion of the last meeting held the 10th of January
1.disinfection step for the vessel cleaning
We studied data we received and we can say :
There no significant added value of using a disinfections step with peraceitc acid in addition of the current acid disinfection.
The use of peracetic acid seems to improve micro result in the cellar of the fith floor ( aging cellar).
In fact if we compare result on six months period ( 1-6/7-12) we saw a difference of only 3% for CCT’s and 24 % for the storage tank cellar.
For CCT’S we suggest increasing circulation time from 20 to 40 minutes and skip the peracetic acid step.
Regarding the cellar of the 5th floor my colleagu will follow some cleaning and check further in detail how to explain these results.
In the last technical report related of dicember meeting (see attachment) we suggest some actions for improving micro situation in this cellar namely :
- Installing a rotating spray ball in maturation tank 5th floor => carry out a trial on one tank
- Implementation of caustic step cleaning.
- These vessel are flat and so not suitable for containing beer with yeast. Currently beer with yeast is filled and yeast decanted in the bottom creating a dense layer of yeast. Fix spray ball is not able to supply mechanical effect to remove this layer of yeast. These tanks should contain only filtered beer.
Are-you planning some of these actions ?
2.Disinfectant in the cold rinse bath water
We launched measurement and we should have first conclusion next week regarding the micro build up in the cold rinse bath.
My colleague will inform you and your staff about first conclusion as soon as possible.
We remind you that the water bath is currently renewed at each bath and concentration of peracetic acid is around 50 ppm even if our standard are 30 ppm.
3.Sequestrant in the warm rinse bath
Currently a sequestrant is dosed in the warm bath 2 of each bottle washer. This product prevent the scale build up and The main objective is to maintain nozzles free of scale and so to insure a correct rinse of bottle. Regarding wall surface, the objective is to maintain a low scale built up and then we consider as normal situation ,within a reasonable level of course, the presence of scale at the area impact of the outpouring water between bath.
At the moment plant aims for a zero scale tolerance and in addition to the preventive scale treatment carried out with the dosage of our sequestratn, plant performs on weekly base an acid descaling with a solution at 5 % v/v .
We foresees one soft descaling per year if needed and then the acid consumption is not included in the contract.
Few possibilities are available should you want to keep a zero tolerance against scale :
Review the global target consumption taking into consideration the consumption of 120 kg acid/machine/descaling. In that case this agreement should be endorsed by the purchasing department and our respected corporate manager;
Stop using our sequestrant and keep carrying out a weekly descaling;
Keep using our sequestratn and stop carrying out a weekly descaling unless for the yearly treatment.
We would like also to point out that a weekly acid descaling may cause corrosion phenomenon when it is apply on a long period. Furthermore this treatment is manually carried out and so that represents a risk in term of safety.
Sincerely,
-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 21-01-2013 19:01
Réponse: E-mail technico-commercial/aide de gerondif, postée le 21-01-2013 à 18:54:36 (S | E)
Bonsoir,
à première vue,:
Dear Mr xxx,
I would hereby like to confirm our position on some topics we discussed when we last met on January 10th
1. disinfection steps for
We studied the data we received and here is what we can say :
There is no significant added value in using a disinfections step with peracetic acid in addition to the current acid disinfection.
The use of peracetic acid seems to improve micro-results in the cellar of the fifth floor ( aging cellar).
In fact if we compare results on a six-month- period ( 1-6/7-12) we saw(pourquoi un prétérit ? we can see) a difference of only 3% for CCT’s and 24 % for the storage tank cellar.
For CCT’S we suggest increasing circulation time from 20 to 40 minutes and skipping the peracetic acid step.
Regarding the cellar of the 5th floor my colleague will follow some cleaning (quel sens ? will attend a cleaning process? assister à une séance de nettoyage?)and check further in detail how to explain these results.
In the last technical report related to the December meeting (see attachment) we suggest some actions for improving micro situation in this cellar namely :
- Installing a rotating spray ball in the 5th floor maturation tank => carry out a trial on one tank
- Implementation of caustic step cleaning.
- These vessels are flat and so not suitable for containing beer with yeast. Currently they are filled with beer with yeast
Are-you planning some of these actions ?
2. Disinfectant in the cold rinse bath water
We launched measurement and we should have a first conclusion next week regarding the micro build-up in the cold rinse bath.
My colleague will inform you and your staff about our first conclusions as soon as possible.
We remind you that the water bath is currently renewed at each bath and concentration of peracetic acid is around 50 ppm even if our standards are 30 ppm.
3. Sequestrant in the warm rinse bath
Currently a sequestrant is dosed in the warm bath 2(in warm bath number 2) of each bottle washer. This product prevents the scale build-up and The main objective is to maintain nozzles free of scale (pluriel?) and so to insure a correct rinse of the bottle. Regarding wall surface, the objective is to maintain a low scale build-up and then we consider as normal situation ,within a reasonable level of course, the presence of scale at the area impact of the outpouring water between bath(pluriel?).
At the moment plant aims for a zero scale tolerance and in addition to the preventive scale treatment carried out with the dosage of our sequestratn, plant performs on a weekly basis an acid descaling with a solution at 5 % v/v .
We foresees one soft descaling per year if needed and then the acid consumption is not included in the contract.
Few possibilities are available should you want to keep a zero tolerance against scale :
Review the global target consumption taking into consideration the consumption of 120 kg acid/machine/descaling. In that case this agreement should be endorsed by the purchasing department and our respected corporate manager;
Stop using our sequestrant and keep carrying out a weekly descaling;
Keep using our sequestrant and stop carrying out a weekly descaling unless for the yearly treatment.
We would like also to point out that a weekly acid descaling may cause a corrosion phenomenon when it is applied on a long period. Furthermore this treatment is manually carried out and so that represents a risk in terms of safety.
Sincerely,
Ouf! Une bonne bière s'impose après cela et sans "écailles"/tartre ??
Réponse: E-mail technico-commercial/aide de taranghiano77, postée le 21-01-2013 à 20:16:04 (S | E)
Merci Gérondif,
Vous méritez bien une bonne bière après toutes vos remarques !
Concernant 'FOLLOW SOME CLEANING' je voulais dire suivre des nettoyages dans le sens de suivre la procédure c'est-à-dire être devant les installations et suivre les phases du nettoyage. Dans ces conditions est-il plus approprié d'utiliser ATTEND ?
Merci encore
Réponse: E-mail technico-commercial/aide de gerondif, postée le 21-01-2013 à 20:22:04 (S | E)
Hello,
to attend a conference: assister à une conférence......
he will supervise a cleaning process, he will check in person a cleaning session....
Réponse: E-mail technico-commercial/aide de taranghiano77, postée le 21-01-2013 à 20:38:58 (S | E)
Dans ce cas 'supervise' est parfait
Saluti
Réponse: E-mail technico-commercial/aide de sherry48, postée le 21-01-2013 à 22:33:35 (S | E)
Hello.
Just a few small details in addition to all the help that gerondif has given you.
...if we compare results over a six months period
...within a reasonable level of course, the presence of scale at the area impact -area of impact or impact area
At the moment __ plant aims for a zero scale tolerance... our sequestration, __ plant...
Few possibilities are available...I think you mean a few...if you don't add the a, it indicates that the possiblities are very limited.
Keep using our sequestrant and stop carrying out a weekly descaling unless (other than/besides/except for?) for the yearly treatment.
We would also like
when it is applied over a long period...
Sherry
Réponse: E-mail technico-commercial/aide de taranghiano77, postée le 22-01-2013 à 12:52:43 (S | E)
Merci Sherry48
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